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Death of a friend


Today I mourn the death of a long time friend,

Common sense has died he came to a very sad end,

Bureaucratic red tape to find his age have tried,

But no one knows for sure how old he was when he died,

He used to teach us we should come in out of the rain,

That life aint always fair if it was we’d be mundane,

That’s why it was the early bird, who always got his worm,

And if we were to blame we stood up we didn’t squirm,

He lived by simple rules never spend what you haven’t got,

It’s us adults who are in charge and children, who are not,

His health began to falter when we all started to regulate,

Passing idiotic rules would only help to seal his fate,

He lost more ground when parents fought teachers at their job,

Because some student or other just couldn’t hold their gob,

Yet parental consent was needed for the least little thing,

But if a student was pregnant there was no one you could ring,

He faltered when it became all business with the church,

Abusers got better treatment then their victims was too much,

He took a hiding when a thief had broken into his home,

When he beat him back he was sued and left there all on his own,

He finally gave up all hope when a lady to court had got,

Was given a large settlement for not knowing steam was hot,

He was preceded by both parent’s truth and trust,

Wife discretion daughter responsibility and a son reason must,

He is survived by his four stepbrothers all doing very well,

Their names are common but no sense yet as far as we can tell,

They are I know my rights, I want it now,

Someone else is to blame and I’m a victim somehow,

These four are now in court since the reading of the will,

Common sense is truly dead for they are fighting still,

The judge who presides the case called justice will prevail,

With solicitors called lies and deceit this too is doomed to fail,

With his family before him and all they may have tried,

This world is a darker place since common sense has died,

As I mourn my dear friend who it seems has come to pass,

A sad day for all humanity he is buried now at last.

04 Nov. 11

The hen killer


I knew a man, who kept chickens in his back yard,

Who moaned he had too many and was willing to discard,

I have too many he said and I want to get rid,

So I bought some off him for a few quid,

I built a shed where no animal would snoop,

And called it simply my chicken coop,

And the hens were put in it and lived cosy and warm,

Safe in the coop they would come to no harm,

Until early one morning I saw a hole in the fence,

One hen dead the culprit I would make pay hence,

I went about fixing the gaping big hole,

Frightened hens don’t lay eggs or so I was told,

The very next morning another chicken lay dead,

This culprit was now wrecking my poor head,

Now I must catch him in the act if I can,

And put an end to his hen killing of which I was no fan,

As I checked all around to find his way into my coop,

I saw where he entered to kill and to snoop,

Deep into the earth I drove a fine hefty stake,

With a snare attached to stop him in his wake,

On the third morning all the hens were roaming free,

They had ran from the coop through another hole you see,

But there by my stake driven deep in the ground,

A neighbour’s dog snared and dead I had found,

A costly lesson he had learned on that night,

If you’re not going to eat my hens then don’t bite,

So I buried the dog in the end of the yard,

With both of my hens he killed and left scarred,

The post office had a board where you could stick up an add,

For the whereabouts of this dog a reward was to be had,

So I dug him up from his earthly old grave,

The price of my two hens returned I might save,

From out of her purse the reward was five pound,

And I buried the hen killer again on her ground,

I felt like telling her he was a killer simple and plain,

But the look on her face made me refrain,

I left her standing there saying all would be fine,

You’re a grand soul she said and you only nine,

My reward in my pocket I went back to my coop,

I slept well that night knowing no killer would snoop.

03.11.2011