black sheep

every family has at least one I guess

Black sheep

 

 

How often do I cross your mind, or do you think I might be included,

Am I a fleeting thought, undefined, a subject to which someone or other alluded,

When gatherings are planned in advance, am I even on your list,

At tables a seat unmanned, am I thought of or even missed,

Is it easier for you to not me invite, fearing I may upset a preferred guest?

Who or what gives you the right, to decide whether or not I will be a pest,

I laugh and say I am the black sheep, always there but never here,

My laughter hides feelings buried deep, pushed aside yet still able to care,

Yes, I am that family member, the one that gets left behind,

Never allowed to be a contender, lost and no one willing to find,

While you sit happy within your chosen group, I am to be avoided,

You accepted by those in the troupe, all of which have now decided,

To trade lip service and politeness, to ease their troubled mind,

Here I sit outside the circle in quietness, the black sheep easy to find,

I am who you all made me; at one time I had a value and use,

An outcast, now you don’t like what you see, little more than a feeble excuse,

I recall times when there was trouble, now and then it was to me you all turned,

To sort out some or other muddle, the bridges to you all have now been burned,

From childhood I learned my trade, from you who went before I could walk,

The black sheep now that mantle laid, no need, no more, no talk,

I like to think I may have tried, at times when it was needed,

Know you all that I have cried, my efforts gone unheeded,

From black sheep land there’s no return, the bridges all raised to ash,

The fires out the feelings turned, a heart of stone not glass,

If at times I cross your mind, or surface as a fleeting thought,

It’s a memory you have no wish to find, like a cold you may have caught,

When gatherings in advance are planned, look hard upon your list,

There is no chair left unmanned; black sheep are never missed,

Now you’ve decided I have no use, the relationship has stalled,

The bridges I build are the ones I choose, but I was there each time you called.