close enough to be far away

Close enough to be far away

 

It must have been a race but no one told me,

From start to finish all the lanes may have been filled,

Where it took place was so much a mystery,

It may have been a relay at times, ye’re batons never spilled,

Well no one bothered to inform me,

 

I thought I was part of the team,

At least that was how it was supposed to be run,

Yet your rule book was so different from the one I’d seen,

All together running and you all were having the fun,

On show for years yet I was nowhere to be seen,

 

Was it a race and if so why didn’t I know?

I spoke to you all almost every week,

I would have partaken if I was asked to go,

But in plain sight you played hide and seek,

Ye’re relationships all strong mine a no go,

 

Running round in groups and if I called, always one on one,

Placating me with platitudes agreeing with my every word,

It was a race alright, but one which I could never have run,

I’m wired differently then you or so I have heard,

So much so, I am not included in your version of fun,

 

It’s too late now I guess you are happy with your race,

No room for someone wired like me,

Keep running together, I am what you cannot face,

I am all you can’t or won’t ever want to see,

I am past I am present I am that place,

 

If it’s a race then I was shoved out,

Simply put, I am all you wish to forget,

In your hurry to run you whisper not shout,

You will forever be caught in my net,

You will see me in every race running about,

 

Just on the edge of your peripheral vision,

A worry that seems distant from you now,

Most likely a group taken decision,

Omitted from inclusion somehow,

Close enough to be distant, by omission.